Remember when we were kids and our parents kept telling us the same thing over and over again and we pretty much ignored them until they had to yell at us to get our attention? Well, God yelled at me yesterday…
Friday night I questioned God’s plan for me, I got a buzz and posted that on Facebook. Drinking and Facebook are never a good mix haha. Anyways I received some good advice and a good friend sent a message to me Saturday that kept niggling at my brain:
Being saved is just the tip of the iceberg! After the salvation experience there is also justification process which is enabled by the Holy Spirit and makes us more and more Christ like. This is not easy. Sometimes God will test us in that process and sometimes he will allow the enemy to temp us in that process. The important part is the growth that results. I hope you can find the answers you are looking for and remember that He always answers but sometimes it is “wait and trust me.”
I kept trying to not think of the questions and anger that I had but then my kiddo came home from her dad’s and it all slipped my mind. That night I went to bed watching Law&Order and in the morning I heard a voice saying “If you want something so bad and it is what your heart truly desires then stop asking for it. He knows what’s in your heart and if it is of His will you will receive it.”
The Holy Spirit was definitely talking to me but I still wasn’t ready to fully listen I guess. At church later that day my pastor was on the pulpit doing his thing and he spoke of James 1.
James 1: 2-4 Consider it a great joy, my brothers, whenever you experience various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. But endurance must do its complete work, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing.
James 1:12 Blessed is the one perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love Him.
I had been questioning my feelings for someone, why the situation is the way it is, why on earth He would let me continue to feel the way I did, and I was angry that He would allow me to go through the pain I was feeling and had been feeling for months. I had said before that I was putting it all into His hands but my faith in that wasn’t strong enough and I continued to question, ask, and be angry.
Well like I said God yelled at me. Three separate times, in three separate ways, and in three separate days; He told me to put it in His hands. That these trials I am going through are for a reason and that I will survive it. It is not my job to question the trials He puts me through and why. It is not my job to question what good will come out of me hurting as badly as I am. We are not supposed to challenge Him or demand things of Him and I will be the first to admit sometimes it’s difficult but when He hollers at you, you better sit up and start listening because you don’t want Him to yell twice.